Six LDS Writers and A Frog

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Night of the Lepus

by Stephanie Black

Last weekend, we had the opportunity to host my ten-year-old son’s classroom rabbit. I wasn’t particularly ecstatic about this, since I am not what one would call an enthusiastic pet parent (I believe “pet parent” is the correct terminology, at least according to PetSmart. I think pets are wonderful things, as long as they are someone else’s. This may be due to the fact that I didn’t have pets when I was a kid, unless you count my younger siblings. It may also be due to some Monkish tendencies on my part (“No you cannot have a lizard! Don’t you know they carry salmonella?”) Or perhaps it’s because my Grinch-like heart is three sizes too small. But whatever the reason, the only animals I’ve allowed to take up permanent residence in the house so far are hermit crabs and teenagers.

I’m kidding about animalistic teenagers, by the way. My teenager and almost-teenager are a lot of fun to have around, though my oldest daughter’s tendency to take regular trips to the police station cost me a huge wad of cash yesterday. No, not for bail. She’s joining a police Explorer post and oh . . . my . . . heck, but police uniforms are expensive. I hope those boots last until the Millennium.

But back to the bunny saga. It was our turn for Mr. Snuggles, and even I wasn’t Grinch enough to say no, we can’t take the bunny. It was only for a weekend, after all.

Mr. Snuggles is a large, gray, fluffy Angora rabbit with fur on his face that looks like mutton chop whiskers. He's a good-natured rabbit—he’d have to be, with all the poking and prodding he gets—and we carted him home in his bunny bin along with his outdoor pen if he wanted to catch some rays. He was litter-box trained, more or less, so we let him wander around the family room. It was actually very cute to have this rabbit relaxing in front of the sliding door—I guess he liked the coolness there next to the glass. Sometimes he’d tuck his limbs under him and sit like a giant ball of fluff. Awwww. So cute. He grew on us—even on me, believe it or not, and even though his bedding got everywhere, we enjoyed having him around. The kids loved him. Even my toddler liked him as long as he was contained. If he was free, she was edgy. Once he hopped toward her (he usually just minded his own business) and she screamed like an extra in Jurassic Park.

We should have trusted her childlike intuition that this bunny was trouble, but in our naivete, we didn’t realize that behind that fluffy exterior lurked Teeth of Doom. Mr. Snuggles destroyed a Palm Pilot docking cord, which fortunately my husband could live without. But he also sank his bunny teeth into my laptop cord. A trip to the Mac store and eighty-five bucks later, I am wiser in the ways of bunnies. I’ll never look at a Cadbury commercial the same way.


At 9/20/2006 2:57 PM, Blogger Evil HR Lady said...

I can't believe you didn't ask us--we would have told you that bunnies love cords.

At 9/20/2006 3:27 PM, Blogger RobisonWells said...

That's what you get for using a Mac.

At 9/20/2006 5:09 PM, Blogger Stephanie Black said...

You're just jealous, Rob. You know you wish you had a Mac.

Evil HR Lady, if we ever end up with Mr. Snuggles again, I will draw from your well of bunny knowledge. And I'll hide the cords.

At 9/20/2006 5:23 PM, Blogger Tristi Pinkston said...

Oh, and don't let them anywhere near vacuum cleaner cords, either.

At 9/20/2006 5:52 PM, Blogger Jim F. said...

All cords--and wallpaper. We had an in-house, litter-box trained rabbit for a while. Had it not been for his propensity to each anything rubber and all wallpaper, he would have been a great pet. But he finally had to go outside.

At 9/20/2006 6:39 PM, Blogger Kerry Blair said...

I often look around my house and and yard and wonder how people and animals ever hooked up in the first place. (It must have been in the Garden of Eden.) When the kids were little we had almost as many pets as Noah. Now that the baby is 19 "we" have only 2 dogs, 2 cats, 1 rabbit, 2 hermit crabs, 1 turtle, 2 chickens (the rooster is my biological alarm clock), and more fish than I care to count. I won't mention that my mother puts out 50 lbs of bird seed a week or that I hang bat boxes. I'd think I need psychological help, but I HAVE given away the ducks and turkeys and resisted -- thus far --bringing home a mini-goat that I really, really want.

In other words, Stephanie, I suddenly feel the need to share my blessings. I'm packing Pebbles's (the mini-lop bunny) little satchel when I get home tonight. She has her own house, yard, harness, leash, traveling case, and a box full of toys. She will chew up a cord, but her tastes run more toward large appliances and $200 textbooks. In other words, don't lose sight of her behind the fridge or anywhere near Intermediate Algebra . . .

At 9/20/2006 8:14 PM, Blogger KB said...

Oh, that was just hilarious! :)

While I definitely prefer Macs, I am at this moment sitting here typing on a PC with 6" strip of silver electrical tape wound down the power cord.


At 9/21/2006 12:45 AM, Blogger Stephanie Black said...

Wallpaper? Vacuum cords? Textbooks? Refrigerators? I'm realizing that we got off easy!


Post a Comment

<< Home