Six LDS Writers and A Frog

Saturday, January 02, 2010

So 2010 Begins...

by Sariah S. Wilson

And with the ushering in of a new year and a new decade, there must, as always, be new resolutions.

I didn't get any real writing done this year. Having kids close in age is HARD. You'd think I'd know this, being the oldest of nine myself (and most of us two years apart in age, which, on a side note, makes it real easy to remember how old everyone is - we're either evens or odds depending on the year and we're two years apart), but for some reason this has been a real challenge for me. I'm seeing the Lord's great wisdom in not sending me more children earlier and closer together. I can definitively say I would have fallen apart. It doesn't help matters that my 2-year-old is still bound and determined to get this baby out of the house by any means necessary, and gives her mother incredible Mommy Guilt (I put the baby down for a nap, she holds up her arms and says, "Oh Mommy, is there room for me now?" She's very dramatic. I don't know where she gets this from), but we also have the usual push and pull of regular life, in addition to having my entire support system move a couple thousand miles away to Utah and having my oldest son go through some pretty severe times that included an in-patient hospital program and changes to his medications. But he's doing so well now and things are easing up and there's starting to be something of a schedule and life doesn't feel nearly as desperate and hopeless as it did when my doctor had to put me on Lexapro for post-partum depression. (Which I stopped taking 1) because I felt better and ran out of all the meds my doctor had given me and 2) because I'm pretty sure it was making my hair fall out and as I told my mother, "Right now I'd rather be sad than bald.")

So Resolution the First: I will get myself on some kind of writing schedule, even if it is for only 15 minutes a day. When I'd heard that Rob Wells got an agent I thought it might be in the realm of possibility for me, too. But this would necessitate, you know, actually writing. I have a romantic trilogy I'm writing where I had a lot for the first book, and just some basic general ideas about the second two. But since I came to a firm resolution that I would do this - the characters in the second two books have had A LOT to say and I'm frustrated that I can't write everything down fast enough. I suppose I could try natural speaking software but that might involve British accents and no good would come of that.

Resolution the Second: I am now the heaviest I have ever been. The last baby did unfun things to my internal organs and things separated and fat stayed. I came to discover this year that I have Hashimoto's thyroiditis, which is an autoimmune disorder. Basically, the rebel white blood cells in my body have decided that my thryoid is Up To No Good and Must Be Stopped. Which involves destroying said thyroid. And as it turns out, thyroids are important for not being fat (they regulate your metabolism). I'm also wondering why if the white blood cells are on a rampage, couldn't they find some nice fat cells to obliterate? Why do they always have to attack stuff you need and not the stuff you don't want? Autoimmune disorders are apparently something that are often genetic, and occur more frequently in women. There's no history of them on my maternal side, and that probably means that in addition to large pores and premature gray hair, I seem to have inherited this funness from my dad's side of the family as well. But we don't know anything about it - my father's mother died when he was an infant, and my father's paternal grandfather ran away from home, changed his name and refused to tell my parents his real name (which they wanted for genealogy). So there's all this family history on my dad's side that we just don't have and we sort of get surprises from time to time with things like this. And then when you take into account what we do know from my maternal side (cancers of varying sizes and colors), the future is sort of troublesome.

But all of that is just a long-winded way of me saying that I have to start doing something to try and improve my situation. I can't be as complacent as I have been, and I will start by adhering closely to a Weight Watchers diet (the only thing that's ever worked for me) and working out with my Wii Fit for 10 minutes a day.

Resolution the Third: I will be better organized this year. I've learned in the past that a lack of organization has cost me and my family money. I will work on systems to help me stay on track and get the clutter out of my head and out of my home. I will pay closer attention to my shopping and getting deals; I will keep my home cleaner.

I will keep track of my progress and write it all down.

What about you? What are your resolutions for this year?


At 1/02/2010 10:09 PM, Blogger L.T. Elliot said...

My resolution is to practice something for 21 days straight. If I can make it that far, I can make it a habit. =]

At 1/03/2010 12:23 AM, Blogger Heather B. Moore said...

I'm avoiding New Year's Resolutions!

At 1/03/2010 12:52 AM, Blogger Tauhid said...

One of my resolutions is to get higher than a 3.0 GPA by the end of spring semester. Hope I stick to it!

At 1/03/2010 5:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sariah, your blogs seem so sad and full of difficulty. Every time I read them I feel so bad for you and the struggles you are having. I hope things get better for you in 2010 and your blogs can be happier and full of your successes. :(

At 1/03/2010 10:07 PM, Blogger Kimberly Job said...

I love the clean slate feeling that new year gives me. I've got some resolutions in mind. I'll have to blog about them so I'm accountable.

Hugs to you. You're doing a great thing. I know how hard raising kids can be. Don't forget to take time for mom. :)

At 1/03/2010 10:26 PM, Blogger Sariah S. Wilson said...

Resolution the Fourth: To stop being so depressing while blogging. I didn't realize it came across that way - but admittedly this has been a very, very hard year on my family and I should probably stop using the blog to vent (and should probably mention that things are actually worse than I make them sound here and there's a lot that I left out. Believe it or not, I do have some boundaries). I promise to be more optimistic and more hopeful this year. I'm actually feeling that way now despite everything that's going on - I just need to find my way up and out.

At 1/05/2010 9:22 AM, Blogger Anna Buttimore said...

My resolutions are the same as yours - write every day, and lose weight. I don't have your health issues to contend with, so I really have no excuse. Good luck to both of us!

At 1/06/2010 11:28 AM, Blogger UTMomof4 said...

One of mine is to get myself un-addicted to diet coke (again). My second is to not gain a ton of weight when I wean my baby this year, which is something that happened with my other three. I sympathize with you on the kids close in age. My 3 year-old is finally adjusting better to his baby brother, but when he was first born 9 months ago, he'd often tell me to put the baby down and hold him. Hang in there!


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