Six LDS Writers and A Frog

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

The 2008 LDStorymakers Conference, an Insider's View

As Jeff mentioned yesterday, the annual LDStorymakers writers conference is this weekend. This is a really great event that has grown every year. And I'm honored and pleased to have the presidents of the organizing committee in the studio with us today for an interview. May I present to you: H.B. Moore (Heather) and Annette Lyon!

Rob: Thanks for being here, ladies!

Annette: No problem. I'm happy to be back. If you recall, I was here several months ago talking about... I can't remember. Something lame, probably.

Rob: We were talking about the role of Positioning in marketing, Annette. I'm kind of hurt that you don't remember. Consequently, my first question is for Heather Moore.

Heather: Hi.

Rob: Hello, Heather. What's the deal with the LDStorymakers name? I mean, seriously?

Heather: You raise an interesting question. What happened is this: we were going to call it something normal, like "The Guild of LDS Writers", but there was typo when we registered the domain name.

Rob: That's a pretty big typo. And aren't you two running an editing company?

Heather: Annette was in charge of that. It was all "Comma splice! Comma splice!" all day long--it's like she doesn't pay attention to anything else.

Annette: And, if I remember correctly, I was pretty drunk.

Rob: Understandable. So, Annette, my second question is for you: What's the deal with that double-duty S in LDStorymakers? Was that a typo, too?

Annette: Listen, Buster, I don't have all day to type every letter of every word. If I can cram a few together, great. Don't judge me.

Heather: She writes her name "Anete Lyon".

Rob: Perhaps she was named after Anete Jekabson, the famed Latvian basketball player?

Heather: Perhaps.

Rob: Moving on. The next question is for you, Annette. Who do you have picked to go all the way in March Madness?

Annette: Oh, I don't get into that thing, as evidenced by the fact that we scheduled the writers conference over the opening weekend.

Heather: Don't believe her, Rob.

Rob: Why's that?

Heather: She's teaching a punctuation class at the conference called "You Bet Your Backslash: How to Tell a Pilcrow from a Diaeresis."

Annette: And it's going to be awesome. Shut up. I mean it--SHUT UP.

Heather: Rob, when I asked her if she needed an overhead projector, she said she needed a TV that got ESPN.

Annette: I hate you, Heather Moore.

Rob: So, she knows that no one will go to such a boring class, so she can just sit in there and watch basketball?

Annette: And 13th-seed Oral Roberts will knock off Pittsburgh in the first round, baby!

Heather: [rolls eyes] Oral Roberts? Who did they beat this year? North Dakota State? SUU?

Annette: They're taller than Pitt up front, and the last time Pittsburgh played in the West they lost to Pacific.

Rob: Okay, back to the conference. I have another question, for either of you. How do you pick who's going to teach classes?

Heather: Well, some of them are easy choices. If we decide we want a slightly controversial class about some hare-brained idea, we ask Jeff. Or, if we need charismatic eye candy, we ask you, Rob.

Rob: Oh, you!

Annette: But some decisions are harder than others. Let's say we have a class about Dialogue. A million authors write dialogue.

Heather: Not non-fiction authors.

Annette: Can you even call them authors, though?

Heather: Those hacks.

Annette: Anyway, in the case that there's no clear choice, we try to find the least offensive author. You know--whichever one has the least body odor.

Rob: It kind of makes you wish that there were other authors who had controversial, hare-brained ideas.

Annette: I get a dozen emails every day that say that same thing.

Rob: I'm sure. So, final thoughts?

Heather: Grammar: who cares?

Annette: Jeff: holy lame.

Rob: Thanks!


At 3/18/2008 3:35 PM, Blogger Michele Holmes said...

Glad to know I have the least offensive body odor :) Though maybe Annette and Heather should have gone for someone with a strong smell--since boot camp is so dang early in the morning (I have to leave my house by six!!), it might've helped wake everyone up.

At 3/18/2008 5:17 PM, Blogger Jeff Savage said...

Yeah, we always ask the greenies to teach bootcamp. Their just so dang happy to be published they'll agree to anything. Okay, not really. It is a bady odor thing. have you ever smelled Rob before ten? Let's just say there's a reason he sits in the back of the morning classes he attends.

At 3/18/2008 5:29 PM, Blogger Kerry Blair said...

Rob smells bad before 10? What happens at 9:45 at conferences that makes him smell better?

Never mind. I don't want to know.

At 3/18/2008 5:33 PM, Blogger RobisonWells said...

At about 9:45 I spray myself down with Febreze. I haven't showered in three years.

At 3/18/2008 6:19 PM, Blogger Annette Lyon said...

Go Oral Roberts!!!


At 3/19/2008 12:06 AM, Blogger Heather B. Moore said...

Getting serious now--Annette does know the difference between an em-dash, an en-dash, and a hyphen.

P.S. The ESPN party is going to be in Josi's room.

At 3/19/2008 12:32 AM, Blogger Tristi Pinkston said...

I love Febreze.


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