Yet Another Christmas Letter (Quick! Turn off the Computer and Pretend You Didn't See it.)

by Kerry Blair

It's Friday again? Already?

Oh, dear.

Let's see . . . I haven't been talking to anybody about anything writing or publishing-related, and all I've been reading is 19th century Christmas lit -- most of which few people would recognize and/or care to discuss -- so where does that leave us?

Wait! I know! I actually wrote a Christmas letter yesterday! (The first since about 1988.) Want to read it?* Here it is anyway.

Gary & Kerry Blair’s Christmas Letter ~ 2010

With both our mailbox and inboxes overflowing with cheery Christmas newsletters, we’d have to be Grinches to let the year pass without sending forth glad tidings of our own. The rub is that when life is as rich and full as ours, where does one begin? **What is that? Oh! Good idea!** The pit bull suggests opening with something festive. Let’s see . . .

Christmas is coming; the goose is getting fat! (But don’t say anything to her about it, okay? She’s very sensitive. I’m sure she’ll be able to drop a few ounces before pool weather returns in the spring.)

With the appropriate seasonal salutation out of the way, I’ll move on to the news. Judging by how many Christmas cards are being forwarded to us, the biggest news for many of you will be that we moved to Dewey-Humboldt! We love it here—truly, everything about it is perfect. Well . . . almost everything. There is a tragically empty stable and corral to consider. Pretty much all my little neighbor friends have horses, thus I have developed a virulent (and possibly fatal) case of equine envy. I begged “Santa” to bring me a pony this Christmas, but he turned very red and almost choked on his chocolate Ho Ho. Fearing an apoplectic seizure, I assured him that I am thrilled with my new dream house and that it alone will suffice as my gift for years and years to come. (Well, the house and the newly-released Twain biography. Don't forget that.)

Rest assured, ye merry gentlefolk, that our kids are jolly. Our daughter graduated with a degree in education then went to work as an assistant manager for Michaels. This seems only fitting since her brother with the economics degree has been teaching since his graduation. The other two boys, er, men are at ASU. Throughout childhood we endeavored to instill in our children a desire for higher education. Apparently we succeeded. We’ve had at least one kid in college every year of the last decade—and there is no end in sight. In fact, one graduate just took the LSAT so he could go back! Our fifth child, Bandi, remains here at home, chasing rabbits, hiding bones, challenging all comers at the fence, and otherwise making herself happy, if not particularly useful. The three cats are here as well—plus one stray more—but I hesitate to mention them for fear of being thought an eccentric cat lady. Which I am.

Lest we fall too far behind all you joyeux grandparents, we’re happy to announce that our family is also growing! Our new grandpuppy, Lyra Aries, is now six months old and the cutest, best-dressed Dalmatian in puppy school. She knows an impressive number of tricks, none of which are “Do not filch sugar cookie dough from the counter!” We also have two new grandtortoises, Nemesis and Crimson, named for our youngest son's squads in Iraq. (They are tough little tortoises.) Our oldest son has blessed us with a large number of grandfish, but since I don’t visit as often as I’d like, I have trouble remembering their names.

My mother still co-decks our halls, of course. Now that she’s almost 83, she’s had to cut back the hours she works. (Last week it was only 50 or so.) I’m sure she’d put in more overtime but for the hundreds of hours of Gunsmoke, Bonanza, and Dr. Quinn she’s recorded to see us through the long winter nights. (Hmm. It just occurred to me that perhaps I’ve been asking the wrong person for a pony. My mother is all about horses!)

And so life continues merrily and brightly along. Even with the many forms of communication available in these latter days, I remain a terrible correspondent. (No news there.) Please know how deeply Gary and I honor our sacred family ties and treasure forever friends. We may not see you in person this Christmas—or even this year—but you will be often in our thoughts and ever in our prayers. With all our hearts we wish a blessed, bright Christmas and joyous, prosperous New Year to you and yours!

Kerry

*No, I don't actually believe anybody will read on, but it will fill an impressive amount of space, thus making it look as though the Frog Blog is not nearly deserted as it is!