Six LDS Writers and A Frog

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

I Become Random

by Stephanie Black

I kept testing and rejecting blog topics and nothing flowed. This means that it’s time to be random. Would that I could take the same approach with my current novel-in-progress.

After years of resistance, I went over to the dark side yesterday and signed up for a store credit card so I could get a discount on my sizable back-to-school purchase. My husband asked me how much I sold my soul for. I told him thirty-nine bucks. But this is an actual Visa I can use at any store, not one of those lame-o-rama department store cards good only at one measly place. Why the heck would I want a piece of plastic I can only use at one store? That concept escapes me.

The old Pop-Tarts box had a warning that said something like: “Caution: Product may be hot when heated.” You don’t say. I thought this warning was the pinnacle of silliness, at least until I burned myself. Now the warning says something like:“Product may be too hot to handle” which sounds much less dorky.

I wish that Get Smart would come out on DVD. That’s one of the greatest shows of all time.

I haven’t yet had a child graduate from college, but I’m certain that having a child attain the ability to manage his or her own stomach flu is a parental triumph more tingling, more glorious, more exhilarating than Harvard, summa cum laude. Anyone who doesn’t agree has obviously never had to rinse quilts and scrub children and carpets at three o’clock in the morning.

I haven’t seen a single summer blockbuster. I think the last movie I saw in the theater was Curse of the Were-Rabbit. The original Wallace and Gromit shows were better.

Netflix is awesome. What a brilliant idea.

Dolores Umbridge from Harry Potter 5 is one of the best villains of all time. She’s just perfectly, hideously evil with her bows and frills and her polite little hem-hem cough.

I recently read a nationally-published suspense novel where the author had some scenes from the unnamed villain’s point of view but clearly didn’t want you to know whether the villain was male or female lest she eliminate some of the suspects. Thus she sometimes resorted to passive tense to get around this problem. (“This was done” instead of “He (or she) did it.”) It bugged me. At least the scenes were brief. Okay, so I’m really picky.

I once got addicted to rice cakes. It was so bizarre. I’d eat like a pack and a half of rice cakes per day. Thank heavens it wasn’t Oreos.

And the last thought for the day: David Suchet is truly a marvelous Hercule Poirot.


At 8/02/2006 12:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

So true about David Suchet. Trying to watch Peter Ustinov now is really annoying.

At 8/02/2006 6:14 PM, Blogger KB said...

Get Smart was my favorite! I used to pretend I was 99.

Uh-oh, that might be a little too much personal disclosure.

Anyway, if you hear of it coming out, please make an announcement.

At 8/02/2006 6:38 PM, Blogger Stephanie Black said...

I'll let you know! I hope it's soon. That show is a classic. The cone of silence . . . the shoe phone . . . Siegfried . . .

At 8/02/2006 9:59 PM, Anonymous Marnie Pehrson said...

Anybody have Reed Benson (Pres. Benson's son) for religion at BYU? He could do a great Get Smart immitation... looked just like him.

At 8/02/2006 10:06 PM, Blogger Sariah S. Wilson said...

Anybody have Reed Benson (Pres. Benson's son) for religion at BYU?

I did. Had him for a couple of religion classes. I had him for Book of Mormon first, and then for a New Testament class.

In the New Testament class (which was a very big class) he had each of us introduce ourselves and say something unique about us. When it was my turn, Bro. Reed said, "Sariah. That's such an unusual name. Where is it from?"

You can imagine how stupid I felt having to inform my former BoM teacher that, "Sariah - Nephi's mom, Lehi's wife? The Book of Mormon? The class that I took from you last semester?"

He turned about 30 different shades of red, but laughed along with the class before moving on to the next person.

Never saw his Get Smart imitation though.

At 8/03/2006 1:38 AM, Blogger Tristi Pinkston said...

Oh my land! Peter Ustinov? Gag me with a spoon! He's so . . . big. When you read the description of Poirot in the book, David Suchet is the perfect embodiment. And I love Hastings, too. I think whoever did the casting got it right on, except they did mess up Miss Lemon. In the books, she's older and frumpier.


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